MY SOLACE

You contemplated for a bit and asked if I ever found pleasure in love.

I was lost for a certain answer, so I smiled.

I am still searching for the proper nomenclature that could explain the fatigue behind searching for solace in something you struggle to trust.

Something you adore at night but despise during the day;

Attired like a cocotte, feigning that you do that all because of me,

While hanging around with a convoy of men

While partying around with all sorts of girls, claiming that you are in a

The youthful stage, which fades away like smoke,

Then you must enjoy it before it fades completely.

In addition, that really hurts me; it "breaks my heart," as they say.

However, how can I trust something like a chameleon?

Why can’t you hang out and party with me instead?

I now believe what they told me—”it is hard to bend a mature tree."

For sure, I have tried to put you in my lane, but then you keep insisting on finding comfort in the opposite, which still assures me that our future will be bright.

Now tell me, how do you expect me to trust you?

Nevertheless, do you want to know what I find solace in?

Reading and laughing at memes in my Redeemer

In fantasy, writing about all that will never exist

In loitering and staring at the fascinating features of the deity,

Short-lived infatuations, romanticizing people based on fleeting moments, attachment issues, and almost everything that is not love,

Life out of trouble is sweet.

I have been through this before, and it seems like I am a slow learner with life, so it has to repeat the same lessons and exams every season.

Nevertheless, even if my love seems different, I promise you that it is not fake.

And even if my voice sounds both childish and womanish,

I assure you that I am the best and strongest man that you have ever had.

You gave up on me just because I seemed jobless, impoverished, and clueless, and because my advice lacked what you called "a foundation."

Because you said that, you would only take my advice,

Only if I were your parent,

However, since I am not, how then do you expect me to trust you?

My solace lies in my acceptance of the possibility of love letting me down, if I ever gave it the benefit of the doubt. Alternatively, shall I walk you through the times it unexpectedly did?

My heart is a muscle, and love may have strained it.

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OUT HERE

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